Dress Code

Sitting on the public bus to school yesterday, I noticed a kind-looking older lady sitting a few seats up from me. I noticed her initially because I was curious what book she was reading, but as my eyes trailed aimlessly toward the floor, I suddenly became aware that her Socks were shouting at me.

"We're Crossword Puzzle Socks!" they blared.

I leaned in for a closer view. It was true. They were Crossword Puzzle Socks, red pencil filling in the squares and all.

"But what are those words in the squares?" I whispered timidly, because I couldn't quite make out the letters. The Socks didn't respond.

I craned my neck. It was worth the effort, because now I could hear the Socks whispering.

"We're a bit racy," they were admitting bashfully.

I saw what they meant as I slowly spelled out the words on them.

...S-

...E-

...X-

...Y. Sexy.

and P-

...O-

...K-

...E-

...R. Sexy and poker.

"You are very racy indeed," I chided the Crossword Puzzle Socks. "You should--" but at that moment, I was interrupted by a startling exclamation as the man directly in front of me stood up to disembark.

"We're Kitchen Utensil Pants!" his pants screamed.

I fell back in my seat and grinned, speechless.