Shower

A series of vignettes
Part II

On this day, the peanut gallery was looking decidedly like a row of gently hunched grandmas. Undeterred by steamed embarrassment rising from the almost-bride's cheeks, the frolicsome bunch quipped away mercilessly.

"Ohh, you should take that if you go to France," a silver voice advised, then turned to a whisper loud enough for the room to hear. "They all wear that sort of thing at the nude beaches there."

"I wish I'd known that was the style of panties now," another said with sparkling sobriety while the victim forced herself to hold up another piece of strategic string. "I'd have crocheted you one."

Keen eyes snapped joyfully at each other through wrinkled, sideways glances. They had been plotting together for nearly three decades. Finally, their moment had come.

"Now dear, I notice you only registered for one sleeping bag..."

A sound of roaring filled the living room and the ground shook under the weight of aching sides. Magically, the gently hunched grandmas transformed into a troupe of laughing maidens, while the virgin child turned into a boiled lobster.